Today I was talking to my colleague Caroline about mental health conversations and why they are or appear to be more difficult to have from the perspective of the person listening. We both agreed that the conversation is pretty much the same one as a physical health one so nothing really out of the ordinary, it’s just a different subject but the types of things you need to say are the same. If someone, a friend or employee maybe approached you to talk, or you asked them how they were the conversation might go like this. You – “Hi Paul, how you doing?” Me – “Not too bad thanks, but I’m suffering from a bad back at the moment and it’s really affecting me” You – “I had noticed you seemed to be struggling, is there anything I can do” Me – “I don’t really know” You – “Do we need to change anything about your work area” Me – “Yep, that might help” You – “How about your workload, are you ok sitting at the computer for a long time” Me – “A look over workload would definitely help” You – “Have you been to see anyone, like the doctor” Me – “No, but I do need to do that” You – “Please make sure you do so you can get well again, do you need any time off, are you well enough to be at work” Me – “I think I’m ok but I’ll keep an eye on it” You – “Great, please do, and make sure if you need sick leave time off that you take it”
But why can’t it be like this?
You – “Hi Paul, how you doing?” Me – “Not too bad thanks, but I’m suffering from a lot of stress at the moment and think I might be depressed and it’s really affecting me” You – “I had noticed you didn’t seem to be yourself but wasn’t sure why, thanks for telling me, is there anything I can do?” Me – “I don’t really know” You – “Do we need to change anything about your work location?” Me – “Yep, that might help, I’d like to work at home one day a week” You – “How about your workload, are you ok sitting at the computer for a long time, do you need more breaks?” Me – “A look over workload would definitely help and I am struggling with longer days and maintaining focus” You – “Ok, let’s have a look at workload later and working patterns, have you been to see anyone, like the doctor?” Me – “No, but I do need to do that” You – “Please make sure you do so you can get well again, do you need any time off, are you well enough to be at work?” Me – “I hope I’m ok but I’ll keep an eye on it and appreciate the chat” You – “Great, please do, and make sure if you need sick leave time off that you take it and let’s set up more regular catch ups” It’s pretty much the same conversation isn’t it, pretty much the same questions. You just can’t see the ‘illness’ but that doesn’t mean it’s not there. Have a conversation, don’t be put off listening because if it’s not a situation you are familiar with. It doesn’t matter if you are a manager or a friend or even if you’re listening to your own manager, just chat and listen. And make sure you have that conversation with people who work remotely from you or the rest of the team, there are a lot of people in that boat, it can be a lonely place and you don’t just need phone calls about work. There’s loads of helpful guidance out there how to have those chats and what the options are, the first step though is active listening. Take Care, Keep Listening Paul
1 Comment
Caroline
10/5/2017 02:22:36 am
This Caroline person sounds great! Still enjoying the blog by the way. Keep going :)
Reply
Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorMr Paul Wyse Archives
January 2021
|